Trumbull Library; Timestamp: 0013 hrs, September 11th 2009
Okay so I’m not doing this blog justice anymore with my infrequent posts but I promise to squeeze in time for one post a week at least! It’s just difficult when you have to juggle insane work schedules (see above) with the pressures of settling in. I’m beginning to find my way around, figure how people here tick, catch up on my readings, but not a day goes by when I wished I was studying in a uniform back home with PEOPLE I KNOW AND <3 LOVE AROUND ME! This longing for home is both painful and intensely weepy so I hope it fades with time.
I submitted my first Directed Studies paper on Friday. I don’t know what to make of it, since the last vaguely academic thing I wrote was the ‘A’ Level H3 Economics paper I did end November 2008 (OCS reflections hardly count) but it’s a milestone in and of itself! Sadly though, sleepless Thursday nights rushing DS papers will become a large part of my life I foresee.
In other news, I was rejected from the Yale debate team, which was immensely disappointing. Like coming here and shedding important identities you cling on to back home (i.e. scholar/Rafflesian/ubiquitous boy? haha) is not disorientating enough, having to see myself lose the ability to identify with a group of people I practically dedicated my entire secondary school career to just left me quite helpless frankly. I guess it’s a good revelation of sorts? I figure it’s not entirely healthy to want to uproot your personae and identities back home and transplant them here. I guess I will venture to create a few new identities of my own during my time here. Have been toying with the idea of playing club sports for Yale. Let’s see how that turns out shall we?
I miss miss miss the Singaporean accent, Singaporean food, Singaporean everything. It’s strange sometimes how my post-college life is set firmly in stone, yet my college career is so hazy, so unknown, so spontaneous, so fluid and malleable. It’s discomforting, but at the same time, I think the most meaningful things in life are invariably uncomfortable.
Like how fat lady in micro shorts crucified my foot last night at Toad’s (it wasn’t meaningful, but it was certainly very uncomfortable). Reminder to self: no more senseless wandering on weekends!
